Back to School Routine

“As summer comes to an end, you've started to buy all the latest school supplies, and your kids are gearing up for a busy school year. The lake days and beach trips will soon be a distant memory. First, congratulations on getting through the summer! That is a significant accomplishment in itself.

From my experience as a therapist, anxiety is a common issue that arises as the school year approaches. I want to help you and your child manage this anxiety so it doesn’t interfere with the new opportunities the next grade level will bring. Whether your child is transitioning to kindergarten, starting middle school or high school, dealing with challenging grades like 5th, or preparing to graduate and leave the nest, anxiety can affect anyone.”

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Here are some ways to keep anxiety at bay:

Family Night Have a night where the family puts away all screens to discuss the highs and lows of the last year and explore the exciting things your child is looking forward to. In my sessions, I've observed that open communication about challenges and fears significantly reduces anxiety. Creating intentional time for communication fosters an environment where your child feels safe to share. It aids in helping your child know you are always there to talk without the need for constant prodding, which can sometimes have the opposite effect.

Schedule Some Breaks We all know the importance of rest. While starting school requires effort that builds resilience and work ethic, we don't want our kids to become workaholics. Balance is key. Many of my teen clients express a desperate need for a break but feel hopeless about getting one. Encouraging breaks helps fuel work ethic instead of causing burnout. Parents, this is the time to schedule restful breaks during school breaks. Allowing them to miss a day or two occasionally can help refuel their energy and prevent burnout.

Encourage Socialization Being part of a community makes stressful times easier to manage. I've seen that students who socialize and connect with peers are less likely to feel isolated. Sometimes, students believe their friends have it easier and don’t struggle with the same issues, which can exacerbate anxiety. Prioritizing time to socialize with friends can dispel this myth and reduce anxiety.

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If your child is struggling, consider therapy. In my practice, therapy provides a space for your child to focus on their health and release pent-up feelings. It also offers an opportunity for parents to learn coping skills to support their child or the whole family.

Set Realistic Goals with SMART Goals >> One effective way to manage anxiety is by setting realistic goals using the SMART framework. From my experience as a therapist, I’ve seen that setting clear, achievable goals can significantly reduce stress and help students focus on what’s important.

Here's how to create SMART goals:

Specific: Goals should be clear and specific. Instead of saying, “I want to do well in school,” specify what that looks like. For example, “I want to improve my math grade from a C to a B.”

Measurable: Make sure your goal is measurable. This allows you to track your progress and stay motivated. For example, “I will complete all my math homework and score at least 90% on all tests.”

Achievable: Goals should be realistic and attainable. Setting impossible goals can increase anxiety. Ensure your goal is challenging but within reach. For example, “I will study for an extra 30 minutes each night.”

Relevant: Your goals should be relevant to what you want to achieve. They should align with your broader objectives. For instance, improving your math grade is relevant if you’re aiming to strengthen your overall academic performance.

Time-bound: Set a deadline for your goal. This creates a sense of urgency and helps you stay focused. For example, “I will improve my math grade by the end of the semester.”

Here’s how to apply this with your child:

Sit Down Together: Discuss what they want to achieve in the upcoming school year. Listen to their concerns and aspirations.

Break It Down: Help them break down their goals into smaller, manageable steps using the SMART criteria.

Track Progress: Regularly check in on their progress. Celebrate small wins and adjust the plan if needed.

Encourage Flexibility: Remind them that it’s okay to adjust their goals as they go. The aim is to make progress, not to be perfect.

By setting SMART goals, your child can navigate the school year with more confidence and less anxiety. This structured approach helps them focus on tangible steps they can take, reducing the feeling of being overwhelmed by big transitions or challenging grades.

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Meet the Author Carolyn Amayo Counseling Associate

Building the life you want, figuring out who you are, and dealing with those 'supposed to have it all figured out' pressures can feel like a juggling act. But here's the thing – it's your life, your journey. I'm here to help you cut through the noise and find your path, minus the pressure to fit that picture-perfect mold.