You’ve probably heard that becoming a mother changes you. You know it changes your priorities, your family, your schedule, your free time, but did you know it physically changes your brain? Along with hormones pulsing through your body, your brain changes during pregnancy and postpartum in order to better accommodate keeping a new life safe and protected. When we understand what this means and how fully it affects a mom, we can have more compassion for ourselves during this vulnerable time.

New moms often find themselves worrying over things that never bothered them in the past or noticing disturbing images popping into their minds. It can feel confusing and scary to not know why or how they are experiencing these things. Knowing more about the changes to your brain and body during this time can be helpful for feeling less confused and having more understanding for what’s going on inside you.

Brain changes during pregnancy and postpartum

Postpartum is a mix of physical exhaustion, hormonal changes, and changes to your brain. Some of these include changes in the amounts of gray matter in different parts of the brain, and a stronger connection between the salience network (threat detection, among other things) and the emotional regulation network. In addition, we can think back to how humans have lived for thousands of years. For so much of human history, newborn babies came with extra threats that required extra protection. Parents had to be on guard for predators, for food shortages, house fires, and diseases that for so many of us now are not things we need to worry about. Many of the adaptations and changes to the brain during pregnancy and postpartum developed in order to protect these new human beings.

Now that we do not have the same dangers to worry about, our human brains still act in many ways as if there are constant threats. That is why intense worry, anxiety, and intrusive thoughts can be so common and difficult during this vulnerable time. Add hormonal changes, lifestyle and relational changes, and lack of sleep, and you have a recipe for some challenging times. So what are some things you can do about it?

Understand what your worries or anxieties are trying to do. They are trying to help and protect you and your baby - although in an unhelpful way. Human brains are incredible and work in a way during the early weeks and months of your baby’s life to protect them.
Have compassion on yourself. Even repeating the phrase “I feel nervous and this makes sense because my brain is on overdrive to protect this new life right now.” The “this makes sense” is key! There is a very good reason for what you’re feeling, and you deserve care and compassion.
Remind your worries or anxieties that you are safe. You can thank your mind for trying to help you, but remind yourself that you and your baby are safe and have resources. “Thank you brain for trying to protect my baby, but we are actually safe and cared for right now. If anything happens, we can always call the pediatrician.”
Reach out for support. Each person’s experience during this time is different, with differing stresses, outside factors, birth experiences, etc. Support during postpartum from family and friends is hugely important. For many people, professional support is also necessary. A professional counselor can help you better understand what’s going on in your brain, help you cope and have self-compassion, and help you look forward as you navigate a new identity and lifestyle.

If you’re feeling overwhelmed navigating the waters of new parenthood, I’d love to come alongside you as a support. Our entire team of licensed counselors is ready to help you with your challenges. We are here to be a part of your team and are on your side! Life can be challenging, let’s simplify together!

References: Barba-Müller, E., Craddock, S., Carmona, S., & Hoekzema, E. (2019). Brain plasticity in pregnancy and the postpartum period: links to maternal caregiving and mental health. Archives of women's mental health, 22(2), 289–299. https://doi.org/10.1007/s00737-018-0889-z